Pedicabo Ergo Sum
by Glacio Drako
Summary: Juliet Starling investigates a pristine apartment building.


With her chainsaw at the ready, our favorite blonde cheerleader bimbo made her way into an abandoned apartment building.

"I don't like this," the somehow-still-talking decapitated head by the name of Nick whined.

Juliet gripped the handle of her chainsaw tighter. "That's why I have this, baby. I'll protect you."

"I know," Nick grumbled. Eh, it's not all that bad. At least his head bounced off her tight ass with every step.

Slowly as to not make any noise, she entered the building, quickly closing the door behind her like a good guest. Sure, hallway needed a good mopping, but other than a few cosmetic issues it was immaculate.

"It's not a despot?" Nick queried.

"I don't think you know what that word means, sweetie," she replied. What her recent life had taught her in the last…eh, one, two, twelve hours?—Anyway, she knew that life was like a box of chocolates.

She began to search each apartment one by one. After an hour she got bored not to mention sweaty.

"Why are utilities the first thing to go in an apocalypse?" Juliet moaned, wiping the sweat off her brow. She pulled the top of her cheerleader uniform and began to flap it. She could kill for a shower. Well, she had already killed, but she was willing to kill living people for one. As if God heard her plight, the next door she opened was a beautiful sparkling bathroom, set up with a toilet, shower and tub, sink with a nicely polished well-light mirror, spotless white tiles, and curtains with cute little duckies on them.

"Hey, will you look at tha—what are you doing?" Juliet unclipped Nick from her waist and set him on the bed a couple rooms away from the bathroom.

"I'm gonna take a shower," Juliet said.

"What are you going to do if a zombie shows up?" Nick asked alarmingly.

"That's what this baby is for." She patted the blade of her chainsaw. "I'll be back in an hour or so, pooky. I'll leave the door open, just in case."

Nick cursed himself as she left. "What a time to lose a body…" he bellyached. "You're a real dick, God."

Juliet leaned the chainsaw between the wall and the toilet. She pulled her top off, but it was difficult because sweat glued them to her heaving bosoms. As soon as she yanked it off her boobs jiggled wildly. Her nipples immediately ballooned from her silver-dollar areolas. She had to sit on the toilet in order to wrench her shoes and socks off. With one single pull she short skirt and thong found themselves on top of her sweat-soaked top. One lone drop of sweat trickled through her scant patch of blonde hairs, over her protruding button, and fell off her fatty clam. Almost forgetting, she pulled out her scrunchies and her hair fell behind her nape.

She moaned lewdly. "It feels good to be out of that!" It took her a few moments of fiddling with the knob to get the water to the lukewarm temperature that she liked. She entered the shower and pulled the curtain closed, not that anybody would see her but it felt weird to have it open. Moans filled the shower as her hands spread water over her body. She soon found out that there were no soap or shampoo or anything else to make her smell pretty, but it was enough to wash the funk off her young skin.

Behind her she felt a presence. At first she ignored it, but the feeling became more insistent. A loud metallic chink finally made her turn around. Her eyes widened. There was a zombie! He was greenish-grey, fairly skinny, and about as tall as her, most of his flesh still intact except for his missing lips that exposed his snow-white gums and teeth. How did she know that it was a he? His half-foot erect penis was a good pointer. Within a blink of an eye, he had her pinned against the wall underneath the cascading water. Her heart stopped. Her chainsaw was within arms' reach, but he would certainly bite her if she made a move. She eyes clenched shut, waiting for the inevitable gnawing.

The zombie seemed quite taken by the large-bosomed piece of meat. His gaze hung over her busty paps. His hands settled on her firm buttocks.

"What the fuck?!" Poor choice of words. He then forced his schlong underneath her snatch and between her thighs and slammed her hips against her curves. His hands didn't go idle as they spread her cheeks apart and kneaded them with brute force.

Needless to say Juliet was utterly confused, which usually wasn't that hard to do. "What are you doing?" The zombie rested his chin between her neck and shoulder and his grunting buzzed her ear. Her two-timing pussy began to slicken. Soon her moan intertwined with his.

"W-where…is…Nickkkkk?" she managed to say.

_In the bedroom…_

"Zzzzzz…." Nick snored.

_Back to the good part…_

His magic soon captivated her and she began to rub against his undead manhood. She clawed his back as she held on. Oddly, this zombie didn't smell and with exception of the water wasn't all that gooey.

She wasn't stupid. She knew that he was here for her body. Originally she had wanted to give her first time to Nick. Ok, that was a lie, but what Nick didn't know wouldn't hurt him.

The zombie seized underneath her tuckus and lifted her up. Juliet hooked her feet over his ass and grabbed onto her shoulders. Despite the zombie's crappy muscles he was really strong. She didn't have much time to admire his strength as he impaled his dick all the way to the hilt. She roared as her canal clamped around the invading member. Immediately she began to hump. The dick filled her almost to her breaking point, but the pain made her even hornier. Her cervix was thumped by his tip as if threatening to pierce the veil into the deepest part of her core.

With undead indifference, the zombie pinned her back against the wall and continued to hammer her pussy. Juliet's eyes rolled back into her skull and her tongue lashed about her lips. Lust blinded her eyes and numbed her perception.

Without much warning he pulled out. Juliet was about to question that but before she could he forcibly led her out of the bathroom and into the hallway where he pushed her onto the ground. Luckily, she caught her fall with her hands and knees, almost skinning her as raw as her pussy. He got over her and with one hand pushed her ample chest to the carpet and forced his dick in from the back. The zombie collapsed and continued his assault.

"Yeah, zombie!" Juliet screamed. "Fuck me! Fuck me! Fuck me!" She chanted louder and louder. She didn't give a fuck whether Nick heard her or not. This zombie is plowing her better than he probably could ever have, even with a body. She could feel and smell his putrefying breath. The thought of how long he could last ran through her mind. Did zombies cum? Can they cum? Rigor mortis, at least for this undead stud, seemed to only affect his thick prick.

Again, he pulled out, but she knew better. He flipped her onto her back and reentered. By the ankles he stretched her legs apart. Juliet began kneading her mangos. The sound of their lovemaking literally dripped in lust as it resounded throughout the otherwise unoccupied building.

_How long can he keep going?_ she thought. Oh, she could keep on going for a long time, but eventually it would get old. His fervid motions would chafe the ever-fucking hell. Then another thought occurred, _Will I get infected from this?_

A putrid whitened tongue snaked in between her toes of her right foot. "The fuck?" Juliet snorted. "What were you in your life, a nympho?" He answered her by licking from her heel to her big toe, and then gave her left foot the same treatment. She began to giggle. It was oddly sexy but it was more ticklish. Pulling on her ankles, the zombie stood up, prompting Juliet to place her hands on the floor. He resumed his worship while fucking her.

"Wow…you're…amazinghehhh…!" Juliet huffed. Her lungs spasmed as they struggled to catch more oxygen. She had never been fucked in this position before, but it was starting to fucking smart.

"You're…hehhurting…meheeh!" she wheezed. As if to show actual consideration, he pulled out and let go and she fell onto the floor. "Oowww! Fuuuuck!" That was going to bruise in the morning. Actually, that would be true for the lower half of her body. Juliet braced herself for the next barrage.

But he just stood there. His cock glistened from her juices, even in the somewhat low lighting. Her cunt lips convulsed open and closed, as if they were gasping for penis. Her fat nipples tingled. Her engorged clit screamed in pleasure. Before her very eyes his necrotized schlong began to deflate.

"No, no, no, non, no, no, no!" She was so fucking close! "You son of a bitch! You get yours and I don't? You're such a typical guy!" He dropped to his knees and began to teeter. Not wanting to find out which way he would fall she kicked him back. The zombie finally collapsed.

Juliet laid back. "Well, that's _another_ way to get rid of them, I guess?" Her pussy leaked fluid. She smiled. She loved the way her ooze dribbled out of her fuckhole. This was going to take a while to climb down.

_Later…._

Juliet entered the room, this time dressed in her usual cheerleader uniform brandishing her pink chainsaw. It took her forever and a half to wipe off all the sweat, zombie spit, and lady goo off her delicate girlish skin with her bare hands. Nick was snoozing away on the bed, just like she left him.

"Good thing you didn't hear that, Nicky-poo," she said. "Well, what he doesn't know…." She chose not to finish that thought. Constant repetition of that saying would have made this overly cheesy. She tapped his forehead. "Wakey wakey, lemon bakey…."

Nick groaned as his eyes fluttered open. "Uhhuh…whaaa?"

"Let stay here for the night," Juliet suggested.

"Do you think it's safe?" Nick quipped.

She tipped her head in thought. "It is now." She noted the brief look of terror on his face. She lovingly rubbed his cheek. "Don't worry, sweetie. I'll protect the both of us." She sealed that deal with a kiss.


End file.
